The 'Barne Yarns' begins



G'day good folk of the Barn Yarn. I know it is an empty, lonely, dusty blog space at the moment, but type it and they might come...although more than likely they won't.

I'm not blogging because I think the web needs more input from somebody whose opinion and humour aren't worthy of a paying gig, but for my own amusement. Admitting that does not mean I won't kid myself that there is an audience peeping at my prose.

So as one of the rare few to stumble into the Barn Yarn, why not take a minute or two to find out what some nobody thinks about stuff, you might even enjoy your time here. If you don't enjoy it at least you will have killed some time or procrastinated that bit longer, oh and don't bother telling me you don't like it, like a care what a nobody like you thinks...unless of course you like it.

Friday, 20 September 2013

Dealings with an old profession


Julia read that Ipoh had a large red light district, and so was automatically on the look out for signs of ladies of the night and their associated activities.  Everybody was a suspect and my job (I guess) was to agree with her assumptions.  We would be walking along and if it was a female:
J “Oooh she could be one”
L “Maybe”
If it was a male
J “Oooh bet he’s looking for one”
L “Dirty bugger”
Couple
J “Ooh wonder if he’s wife knows”
L “Could be his wife”
J “Nah, she’s at home in the country looking after his 25 ratbag kids and his charging the entertainment to his company”
L “Hard to argue with insight like that”. 
Malaysia- 09    
(Stuck in Madrid in Volcanic Ash event April/May? 09)
Julia's favourite part of Madrid was the 'prosti' mall where the 'girls of the night' actually plied their trade at all hours of the day. We must of walked down the street a hundred times, conducting transects (7 ladies per 15m2), mapping the regions (African girls bottom end, southern Europeans in front of fancy hotel, Russian/Eastern block top end), and taking photos (heap of me in the corner of shots with 'ladies' and the occasional punter behind me)...... Finally Qatar Air came good with the tickets to a flight home. I don't know if it was just me but the long suffering employee Lorena seemed as chuffed as us. We had even bought her choccies as thanks. It appeared she had tears in her eyes when we handed the gift over, I didnt think they were that bada brand, Jules also looked a bit teary, I didnt know she was that attached to chocolates, I'm a man so I looked pretty cool and tough. We woke up on our final morning overseas, next stop Melbourne. Julia took one more walk down 'prosti' mall to say goodbye, and probably took the best photo of our trip. Beautifully framed with just a hint of my shoulder in the corner there is a little 5ft tall, greasy looking middle aged man, bargaining with a 6ft plus, platinum blonde, Russian  beauty. We waved goodbye to the ladies and headed for the plane! 

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